What is it that makes us feel complete - like we have nothing else we could possibly want? In our world, we too often profess "if I had that job", "if I could get more money", "if I could find true love", "if I could look like that", or "if I could lose 10 more pounds" - if, if, if - a life built on "ifs" isn't much to live for, is it?
Each day, I try to choose to live in the place where I am already happy, counting my blessings and things that I already have in my life, instead of what I don't have. Trust me, this is not always easy. In fact some days, I have to lay in bed a few minutes longer to let the reminder set in, coaching myself through each step. After all, if I start out my day wishing for a bunch of things to happen to make me happy or to complete me, then I miss out on every moment in between - I miss the sun shining down on me, or the simple grace of having a door to lock behind me, or a bed to roll out of, or the wonderful people who are in my life right now.
The most quoted Psalm in the Bible says "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want." (Psalm 23)
Think about that for a moment.
Where do you find your rest and contentment? Why do want those things? Would we really be better for having them?
I learn everyday how there is nothing else I need other than Jesus. I came into this world with nothing and I can take nothing with me when I go. So, why am I trying to find happiness with things in the space between life and death?
Live on purpose. You are not defined by possessions, or relationships, or status - you are meant to know one thing - you are loved. From the moment you are born you already have everything you will ever need. And there is an indescribable God who stands in the space between, loving us regardless of anything.
Be blessed.
Do not go gentle.
Ephesians 2:8-9
"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast."
Philippians 4:6-7
"do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving lt your requests be made known to God."
Matthew 6:25-
"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteous, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
Monday, February 24, 2014
Friday, February 7, 2014
Hi, I'm Kenny and I sincerely apologize.
In case you missed the title, my name is Kenny and I am really sorry.
"What have you done?", you ask. Well, aside from the general missteps, nothing.
But I feel the need to apologize.
Many of you (standard 12 to 14 who look at this blog regularly) may have noticed that recently I have been posting about my faith a lot. This has always been something important to me. And as I have explored it further, I've uncovered a litany of hurts for others. Hurts as in, many people who have been misled by the very people who also post about their faith, but litter their posts with "you need to", "you should", "if you don't", and the like. Let me apologize for that misconception, and offer this instead: I do not know everything, nor am I in any way better than any one else. Period. Exclamation point. And those others who post those things, know in their hearts the same thing.
So, let me put it simply. I have been introduced to someone who revolutionizes my life daily, who pushes me to excel in areas beyond myself and who loves me despite everything I have ever done wrong or I ever will do wrong. I know Him, but I meet Him new every day.
He is Jesus.
He is my best friend, and so much more. I don't always understand what He is doing in my life, but I learn daily to trust Him and be vulnerable so that I grow and become better than yesterday.
So, I apologize for the misconception that have been presented before that others who know Him have their lives together, or can tell others what to do, or are in any way better than any one else.
The truth is, we are all equal.
The truth is Jesus loves all of us, no matter where we are or what we think.
I have a friend that you should meet. He's far better than I'll ever be, and I'm so thankful for that.
Anything good I do comes from Him.
I hope you get to meet Him, and maybe He will bless us both to meet Him together.
Do not go gentle.
Monday, February 3, 2014
worth
I'm constantly battling with God over what my worth is. There are things and events that I desperately want to happen in my life, that I, for one reason or another, believe would bring me value and worth. What He constantly whispers into my life is "Your worth doesn't live there."
I think:
"If I just had that car."
"If I could afford this house."
"If I could be like that person."
"If I could be loved like that."
The lie that we have listened to for so long is where our worth lies. There is no amount of money that can buy happiness. There is no possession that makes you any better. There is not even another person on this earth that can make you a more valuable creation.
Creation. That's what we are. We too often fail to remember where we came from; from the hands of an immaculate Creator, the Author of The Greatest Story Ever Told/The Story Written Every Day With Every Breath. We are the most exciting part of the creation story and the most prized possession of Almighty God/Yahweh/Jehovah/Elohim/I Am/Father.
Honestly, I'm afraid of a world that is fueled by possession, because there will never be enough. By putting your worth in what you own, you become owned by your possessions. How silly to be enslaved by something we name and create, and dub "luxury", "gold', "exclusive".
Below is a story from the book of Daniel, that pushes me in who I really am. Read and consider for yourself which person are you, Belshazzar or Daniel. In this life, there is no gray area. We are either awake to where our value lies or asleep in the deception of our worth being determined by status and possession.
Do not go gentle.
Daniel 5
King Belshazzar made a great feast for a thousand of his lords and drank wine in front of the thousand.
Belshazzar, when he tasted the wine, commanded that the vessels of gold and of silver that Nebuchadnezzar his father had taken out of the temple in Jerusalem be brought, that the king and his lords, his wives, and his concubines might drink from them. Then they brought in the golden vessels that had been taken out of the temple, the house of God in Jerusalem, and the king and his lords, his wives, and his concubines drank from them. They drank wine and praised the gods of gold and silver, bronze, iron, wood, and stone.
Immediately the fingers of a human hand appeared and wrote on the plaster of the wall of the king's palace, opposite the lampstand. And the king saw the hand as it wrote. Then the king's color changed, and his thoughts alarmed him; his limbs gave way, and his knees knocked together. The king called loudly to bring in the enchanters, the Chaldeans, and the astrologers. The king declared to the wise men of Babylon, “Whoever reads this writing, and shows me its interpretation, shall be clothed with purple and have a chain of gold around his neck and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom.” Then all the king's wise men came in, but they could not read the writing or make known to the king the interpretation. Then King Belshazzar was greatly alarmed, and his color changed, and his lords were perplexed.
The queen, because of the words of the king and his lords, came into the banqueting hall, and the queen declared, “O king, live forever! Let not your thoughts alarm you or your color change. There is a man in your kingdom in whom is the spirit of the holy gods. In the days of your father, light and understanding and wisdom like the wisdom of the gods were found in him, and King Nebuchadnezzar, your father—your father the king—made him chief of the magicians, enchanters, Chaldeans, and astrologers, because an excellent spirit, knowledge, and understanding to interpret dreams, explain riddles, and solve problems were found in this Daniel, whom the king named Belteshazzar. Now let Daniel be called, and he will show the interpretation.”
Then Daniel was brought in before the king. The king answered and said to Daniel, “You are that Daniel, one of the exiles of Judah, whom the king my father brought from Judah. I have heard of you that the spirit of the gods is in you, and that light and understanding and excellent wisdom are found in you. Now the wise men, the enchanters, have been brought in before me to read this writing and make known to me its interpretation, but they could not show the interpretation of the matter. But I have heard that you can give interpretations and solve problems. Now if you can read the writing and make known to me its interpretation, you shall be clothed with purple and have a chain of gold around your neck and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom.”
Then Daniel answered and said before the king, “Let your gifts be for yourself, and give your rewards to another. Nevertheless, I will read the writing to the king and make known to him the interpretation. O king, the Most High God gave Nebuchadnezzar your father kingship and greatness and glory and majesty. And because of the greatness that he gave him, all peoples, nations, and languages trembled and feared before him. Whom he would, he killed, and whom he would, he kept alive; whom he would, he raised up, and whom he would, he humbled. But when his heart was lifted up and his spirit was hardened so that he dealt proudly, he was brought down from his kingly throne, and his glory was taken from him. He was driven from among the children of mankind, and his mind was made like that of a beast, and his dwelling was with the wild donkeys. He was fed grass like an ox, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven, until he knew that the Most High God rules the kingdom of mankind and sets over it whom he will. And you his son, Belshazzar, have not humbled your heart, though you knew all this, but you have lifted up yourself against the Lord of heaven. And the vessels of his house have been brought in before you, and you and your lords, your wives, and your concubines have drunk wine from them. And you have praised the gods of silver and gold, of bronze, iron, wood, and stone, which do not see or hear or know, but the God in whose hand is your breath, and whose are all your ways, you have not honored.
“Then from his presence the hand was sent, and this writing was inscribed. And this is the writing that was inscribed: Mene, Mene, Tekel, and Parsin. This is the interpretation of the matter: Mene, God has numbered the days of your kingdom and brought it to an end; Tekel, you have been weighed in the balances and found wanting; Peres, your kingdom is divided and given to the Medes and Persians.”
Then Belshazzar gave the command, and Daniel was clothed with purple, a chain of gold was put around his neck, and a proclamation was made about him, that he should be the third ruler in the kingdom.
That very night Belshazzar the Chaldean king was killed. And Darius the Mede received the kingdom, being about sixty-two years old.
Ephesians 2:4-9
Jeremiah 29:11
Matthew 10:29-33
Romans 5:6-8
Romans 8:32
1 John 3:16-17
I think:
"If I just had that car."
"If I could afford this house."
"If I could be like that person."
"If I could be loved like that."
The lie that we have listened to for so long is where our worth lies. There is no amount of money that can buy happiness. There is no possession that makes you any better. There is not even another person on this earth that can make you a more valuable creation.
Creation. That's what we are. We too often fail to remember where we came from; from the hands of an immaculate Creator, the Author of The Greatest Story Ever Told/The Story Written Every Day With Every Breath. We are the most exciting part of the creation story and the most prized possession of Almighty God/Yahweh/Jehovah/Elohim/I Am/Father.
Honestly, I'm afraid of a world that is fueled by possession, because there will never be enough. By putting your worth in what you own, you become owned by your possessions. How silly to be enslaved by something we name and create, and dub "luxury", "gold', "exclusive".
Below is a story from the book of Daniel, that pushes me in who I really am. Read and consider for yourself which person are you, Belshazzar or Daniel. In this life, there is no gray area. We are either awake to where our value lies or asleep in the deception of our worth being determined by status and possession.
Do not go gentle.
Daniel 5
King Belshazzar made a great feast for a thousand of his lords and drank wine in front of the thousand.
Belshazzar, when he tasted the wine, commanded that the vessels of gold and of silver that Nebuchadnezzar his father had taken out of the temple in Jerusalem be brought, that the king and his lords, his wives, and his concubines might drink from them. Then they brought in the golden vessels that had been taken out of the temple, the house of God in Jerusalem, and the king and his lords, his wives, and his concubines drank from them. They drank wine and praised the gods of gold and silver, bronze, iron, wood, and stone.
Immediately the fingers of a human hand appeared and wrote on the plaster of the wall of the king's palace, opposite the lampstand. And the king saw the hand as it wrote. Then the king's color changed, and his thoughts alarmed him; his limbs gave way, and his knees knocked together. The king called loudly to bring in the enchanters, the Chaldeans, and the astrologers. The king declared to the wise men of Babylon, “Whoever reads this writing, and shows me its interpretation, shall be clothed with purple and have a chain of gold around his neck and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom.” Then all the king's wise men came in, but they could not read the writing or make known to the king the interpretation. Then King Belshazzar was greatly alarmed, and his color changed, and his lords were perplexed.
The queen, because of the words of the king and his lords, came into the banqueting hall, and the queen declared, “O king, live forever! Let not your thoughts alarm you or your color change. There is a man in your kingdom in whom is the spirit of the holy gods. In the days of your father, light and understanding and wisdom like the wisdom of the gods were found in him, and King Nebuchadnezzar, your father—your father the king—made him chief of the magicians, enchanters, Chaldeans, and astrologers, because an excellent spirit, knowledge, and understanding to interpret dreams, explain riddles, and solve problems were found in this Daniel, whom the king named Belteshazzar. Now let Daniel be called, and he will show the interpretation.”
Then Daniel was brought in before the king. The king answered and said to Daniel, “You are that Daniel, one of the exiles of Judah, whom the king my father brought from Judah. I have heard of you that the spirit of the gods is in you, and that light and understanding and excellent wisdom are found in you. Now the wise men, the enchanters, have been brought in before me to read this writing and make known to me its interpretation, but they could not show the interpretation of the matter. But I have heard that you can give interpretations and solve problems. Now if you can read the writing and make known to me its interpretation, you shall be clothed with purple and have a chain of gold around your neck and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom.”
Then Daniel answered and said before the king, “Let your gifts be for yourself, and give your rewards to another. Nevertheless, I will read the writing to the king and make known to him the interpretation. O king, the Most High God gave Nebuchadnezzar your father kingship and greatness and glory and majesty. And because of the greatness that he gave him, all peoples, nations, and languages trembled and feared before him. Whom he would, he killed, and whom he would, he kept alive; whom he would, he raised up, and whom he would, he humbled. But when his heart was lifted up and his spirit was hardened so that he dealt proudly, he was brought down from his kingly throne, and his glory was taken from him. He was driven from among the children of mankind, and his mind was made like that of a beast, and his dwelling was with the wild donkeys. He was fed grass like an ox, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven, until he knew that the Most High God rules the kingdom of mankind and sets over it whom he will. And you his son, Belshazzar, have not humbled your heart, though you knew all this, but you have lifted up yourself against the Lord of heaven. And the vessels of his house have been brought in before you, and you and your lords, your wives, and your concubines have drunk wine from them. And you have praised the gods of silver and gold, of bronze, iron, wood, and stone, which do not see or hear or know, but the God in whose hand is your breath, and whose are all your ways, you have not honored.
“Then from his presence the hand was sent, and this writing was inscribed. And this is the writing that was inscribed: Mene, Mene, Tekel, and Parsin. This is the interpretation of the matter: Mene, God has numbered the days of your kingdom and brought it to an end; Tekel, you have been weighed in the balances and found wanting; Peres, your kingdom is divided and given to the Medes and Persians.”
Then Belshazzar gave the command, and Daniel was clothed with purple, a chain of gold was put around his neck, and a proclamation was made about him, that he should be the third ruler in the kingdom.
That very night Belshazzar the Chaldean king was killed. And Darius the Mede received the kingdom, being about sixty-two years old.
Ephesians 2:4-9
Jeremiah 29:11
Matthew 10:29-33
Romans 5:6-8
Romans 8:32
1 John 3:16-17
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
dare to overcome
In this life, we are given just a few breaths to become something great. Just a few heartbeats. A lifetime of irreplaceable moments. A blank canvas of time. What will you create with it?
Finding that this life is mortal and fleeting confirms the importance of every moment. You are only held back from doing anything by the walls you build around yourself. You are not your past. You are not what you have been through. You are defined by what you have overcome, by the trials that you have let make you better and stronger.
Step out. Be bold. Dream. Never give up.
This life is meant to be lived. Every single moment.
So, as we set about trying to right the wrongs of last year, focus on the positives in your life, the blessings of what you do have. This year is a clean slate. A chance to live up to the potential you possess.
This year, everything changes. This year, we shall overcome.
Do not go gentle.
Finding that this life is mortal and fleeting confirms the importance of every moment. You are only held back from doing anything by the walls you build around yourself. You are not your past. You are not what you have been through. You are defined by what you have overcome, by the trials that you have let make you better and stronger.
Step out. Be bold. Dream. Never give up.
This life is meant to be lived. Every single moment.
So, as we set about trying to right the wrongs of last year, focus on the positives in your life, the blessings of what you do have. This year is a clean slate. A chance to live up to the potential you possess.
This year, everything changes. This year, we shall overcome.
Do not go gentle.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
the wallflower
I have spent my life as a wallflower. In most social situations, I sit quietly watching the world around me pass, for many reasons. But it wasn't until recently I realized that was because I did not really value myself.
There is something quite beautiful about loving and valuing yourself. I'm not talking about a pompous attitude. No. Trust me, no one likes the pompous attitude. But being overly humble, to the point that you quiet your own voice, isn't exactly going to win you the mantle of Most Likely to Succeed. We value affirmation, but that praise has to begin within us. We have to believe we have worth in order to receive it.
Being a wallflower can be just fine in some scenarios, but it's not meant for us to live our lives entirely that way. We have to love ourselves enough to show the world what we can do. You will only find what you are capable of when you step out from the shadows and be what you were meant to be. Until you love yourself, you will never be ready or able to receive love.
This is a lesson that I'm personally learning every day. I pray you find your love, worth and value as well. And let's enjoy the journey.
Love yourself. You are worthy. Your life has purpose. And it all starts with you.
Do not go gentle.
There is something quite beautiful about loving and valuing yourself. I'm not talking about a pompous attitude. No. Trust me, no one likes the pompous attitude. But being overly humble, to the point that you quiet your own voice, isn't exactly going to win you the mantle of Most Likely to Succeed. We value affirmation, but that praise has to begin within us. We have to believe we have worth in order to receive it.
Being a wallflower can be just fine in some scenarios, but it's not meant for us to live our lives entirely that way. We have to love ourselves enough to show the world what we can do. You will only find what you are capable of when you step out from the shadows and be what you were meant to be. Until you love yourself, you will never be ready or able to receive love.
This is a lesson that I'm personally learning every day. I pray you find your love, worth and value as well. And let's enjoy the journey.
Love yourself. You are worthy. Your life has purpose. And it all starts with you.
Do not go gentle.
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
death of Superman
1 Corinthians 9:24-27
Hebrews 12:1-13
Proverbs 4:26
2 Corinthians 4:7
I'm prideful. I'm selfish. I can be deceitful. I can be vindictive. I succumb to anger. I'm envious. I fail to uphold my word. I worry. I doubt. I judge. I hate. I lie. I hurt. I fail.
I'm a failure, and that's a beautiful thing.
All of these things are extremely hard to admit, and none are aspirations, but every one of them points towards the fact that I can not do anything on my own. I can only do so much to fix them in my life. Ultimately, I need someone to help me clean house in my life. My own strength only feeds the cycle.
Growing up, I always aspired to be a superhero. I would strap on my Superman cape, gloves, beanie, and some ill-fashioned sword, so that I could race around to save the world. Who wouldn't want to be a superhero? They can do anything. They overcome the greatest odds and always come out on top. They possess great strength and courage. They are truthful. They are valiant. They are moralistic. They are, in many ways, what we all dream of being in our own lives. This is where we learn to try and do it all on our own.
I believe we all are meant for something greater than what we settle for, for lives that are far superior to our dreams. In the text, Paul talks about not aimlessly living, but forcing himself to be better, so that he doesn't disqualify himself from the very prize that he teaches about. If we aren't pushing ourselves to be greater every day, then we are settling for less than our capabilities, for less than we were meant to live for.
Above, I listed some of my faults. If I listed them all, you'd still be reading a super-depressing list. The truth is that none of these things define me. I have to place them in the rear-view of my life and press towards that awesome version of myself that exists on the road ahead. It takes work every day. But, I can not do it alone. I have placed my faith in someone far greater than me, who wants me to be what I was created for. Who would know my purpose better than the one who created me?
Stop trying to be a Superman or Superwoman. In this life, you will find that trouble abounds and when you allow God to handle it and lead you, it is a much easier road.
My failures continue to teach me that there is a better life than the one I live in. I can be better than all of those things. When I focus on what I can control in my life and leave the uncontrollable to God, I find the failures and shortcomings decrease. I find I'm happy. I find my heart headed in the right way. I find that those things I don't like about me are being changed into something better than I could dream. I'm shown flashes of who I really could be.
I fail so I know my life is better in God's strength. I get better and grow so I see Him at work in life, loving me through my failures. A creator creates that which He loves and takes joy in.
Do not go gentle.
Hebrews 12:1-13
Proverbs 4:26
2 Corinthians 4:7
I'm prideful. I'm selfish. I can be deceitful. I can be vindictive. I succumb to anger. I'm envious. I fail to uphold my word. I worry. I doubt. I judge. I hate. I lie. I hurt. I fail.
I'm a failure, and that's a beautiful thing.
All of these things are extremely hard to admit, and none are aspirations, but every one of them points towards the fact that I can not do anything on my own. I can only do so much to fix them in my life. Ultimately, I need someone to help me clean house in my life. My own strength only feeds the cycle.
Growing up, I always aspired to be a superhero. I would strap on my Superman cape, gloves, beanie, and some ill-fashioned sword, so that I could race around to save the world. Who wouldn't want to be a superhero? They can do anything. They overcome the greatest odds and always come out on top. They possess great strength and courage. They are truthful. They are valiant. They are moralistic. They are, in many ways, what we all dream of being in our own lives. This is where we learn to try and do it all on our own.
I believe we all are meant for something greater than what we settle for, for lives that are far superior to our dreams. In the text, Paul talks about not aimlessly living, but forcing himself to be better, so that he doesn't disqualify himself from the very prize that he teaches about. If we aren't pushing ourselves to be greater every day, then we are settling for less than our capabilities, for less than we were meant to live for.
Above, I listed some of my faults. If I listed them all, you'd still be reading a super-depressing list. The truth is that none of these things define me. I have to place them in the rear-view of my life and press towards that awesome version of myself that exists on the road ahead. It takes work every day. But, I can not do it alone. I have placed my faith in someone far greater than me, who wants me to be what I was created for. Who would know my purpose better than the one who created me?
Stop trying to be a Superman or Superwoman. In this life, you will find that trouble abounds and when you allow God to handle it and lead you, it is a much easier road.
My failures continue to teach me that there is a better life than the one I live in. I can be better than all of those things. When I focus on what I can control in my life and leave the uncontrollable to God, I find the failures and shortcomings decrease. I find I'm happy. I find my heart headed in the right way. I find that those things I don't like about me are being changed into something better than I could dream. I'm shown flashes of who I really could be.
I fail so I know my life is better in God's strength. I get better and grow so I see Him at work in life, loving me through my failures. A creator creates that which He loves and takes joy in.
Do not go gentle.
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
control
When I look at the road ahead in my life, I can see countless trials and difficulties lying in wait. Even at the present moment, irritations and struggles are crouched in attack position, ready to devour me. What should I do?
Normally, my instincts take over and I do everything in my power to control all the situations, each hindrance as it comes. But, there comes a time when I can no longer fight, when I tire and curse the situation, when I doubt why I'm even on this road. The problem is the road I'm on is my own life.
We are not built to carry stress and to endure endless hardship, yet our ship is set afloat in treacherous waters. Most of the time, if you are doing something right, you meet the most trouble along the way. Why, you ask? Because our world is not inherently good. And evil doesn't approve of the triumphs of good. Searching your own heart, you know when your intentions are good.
I have recently learned (and I'm still learning) that I can not carry the weight of these burdens myself. In fact, they are not to be carried at all. When I try and control every aspect of my life, every time I am pulled down, crashing back to earth in defeat. The lesson: stop trying to control everything. Now, don't confuse relinquishing control with apathy. All of our lives have a purpose and we should be focused on their direction, but I'm talking about controlling all the irritants and trials along the way.
If your focus is on the struggle, you'll lose sight of the goal every time.
We are a ship at sea. All we have is a rudder and sails to help aide us in our direction. We can't look at the rough seas ahead and grow weary, we instead should focus on the light of the calm sea beyond the current storm. It is hope which should drive us, not control.
So, when you are overwhelmed, relinquish control. Lay your burdens down at the feet of God. He who can create from nothing, can heal any burden. Set your eyes on the road ahead and don't let the trappings of stress and the irritations of life derail you from who you are or where you are going.
Know yourself. Know your goal. Find peace.
Do not go gentle.
Matthew 11:28-30
Isaiah 53:4-6
Psalm 68:19
Galatians 6:2
Proverbs 16:32
James 4:1-2
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